How to forgive yourself and move on
I have heard at least a thousand times those words: “You should forgive yourself and move on”.
I have never really gotten the context of this sentence until I really made a huge mistake on my own.
In the beginning, I thought I was spending sadness and depressed days because of the consequence of those stupid – full of innocent decisions.
I was lying on bed, waking up and pretending to fall asleep again.
I buried my body and my soul in the dark darkness of the past that I wanted to disappear.
After a while, I was finally able to stand up and slowly start to fix what left behind the mess I created as time went by.
Things began to get better.
I thought I could enjoy a good life then.
But the answer was still NO.
I constantly came back to those days when I was putting my mind, my energy and my trust in the wrong places.
I started to cry day and night, again and again, and over again.
Until a random sunny day, I suddenly realized that no matter how much progress I have been able to make, I still couldn’t forget those foolish times.
Somehow I got the blame, all on me, all the time, as if everything that happened was just all my faults.
Time flies as it had to be.
Another part of my life has gone while I was busy blaming myself for what already happened.
For some reason, I have been slightly getting older with some wrinkles at the corners of my eyes, meeting new people and listening to more life stories.
By one way or another, I came to know that everyone makes mistakes, meaning EVERY SINGLE HUMAN BEING MAKES MISTAKES, under different forms and left with different scars.
So do I.
NOBODY IS PERFECT.
So am I.
I made a big smile on my foolish past. I forgave myself.
Life continues its journey.